I am very comfortable giving out appropriate, culturally-sensitive greetings. Just call me a sentimental softie. So, to all: Happy Holidays!
Now, that being said, and considering our current litigious environment, I should state the following:
This statement of good wishes ("Greeting") from me ("Sender") is intended to be generic in nature. "Holiday" is intentionally left an undefined term. This holiday may include, but not be limited to, Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanzaa, New Year's Day, Saturnalia, or even Elvis' Birthday ("Elvis" is a registered trademark of Elvis Presley Enterprises, Memphis, TN). Further, the recipient of this greeting ("Receiver"), may insert his or her own holiday into this Greeting, or no holiday at all, if he or she chooses. If Receiver celebrates no holidays during the intended period of Greeting, assumed to be roughly mid-December through the first week of January, 2008 ("Greeting Period"), he or she may consider Greeting to be general, and a simple wish of good feelings and joy, suitable for any time of year.
Greeting should in no way be construed to guarantee or warrant happiness or other good feelings during Greeting Period, or warrant or guarantee an acceptable holiday. By accepting Greeting, Receiver expressly agrees that he or she assumes the risk for his or her own holiday. Receiver will hold Sender harmless should Receiver's expectations for Greeting Period and wishes contained herein do not coincide.
Greeting is at all times subject to withdrawal by Sender, and it may be canceled or modified at any time, without notice to Receiver. In the event of cancellation, Receiver shall receive no credit or proration for any time left in Greeting Period. Greeting is not intended to be transferable, and has no cash value. Under no circumstances may Receiver in any way alter Greeting, or publish Greeting directly or indirectly without express written permission of Sender. Permission may be withheld for any reason within the sole discretion of Sender, with no rule of reasonableness.
Should Receiver not accept the terms of Greeting listed above, no rights or benefits related to Greeting will accrue.
Should a dispute arise from Greeting, Receiver agrees that jurisdiction and venue will be in the courts of Shelby County, Tennessee. Greeting will be construed under the laws of the State of Tennessee, without regard to Choice of Law or Renvoy.
Heartwarming, ain't it?!